Pardon the interruption, but I gotta touch on that insane Royals game from last night. Talk about a roller coaster of emotions. The twists, the turns. Hosmer's triple off the wall. Dyson's steal and subsequent confirmation of what speed do. And the bunts. Ohhhh, the bunts.
And I just might need to shut my mouth about the 1-game playoff format I was bitching and moaning about all week. You saw the argument in favor of it last night. Similar to the NCAA Tournament, I don't think it's fair to let a 162-game season come down to one game, but last night's game isn't nearly as riveting with more games lurking behind it.
I'm still in shock about it. I mean, it was the best Kansas City sports moment since ... well, since about 26 hours prior when the Kansas City Chiefs delivered a Monday Night Foot to the Balls of the New England Patriots.
Let's KCheck it out...
The Best & Worst w/ His Dirkness
Best Chiefs victory since ...? - Judging in terms of quality of opponent, magnitude of game, and overall team performance, lets check out some candidates...
- 2013 was a blast, but neither the Eagles or Redskins wins even approach Monday Night's Mutilation
- Beating the 13-0 Green Bay Packers in 2011. On the surface, it outranks Monday Night's Mauling, but this game suffers from a historical downgrade because it led directly to the hiring of Romeo Crennel.
- Thanksgiving Night over the Broncos in 2006. Memorable: Yes. Big stage: You betcha. But they only won 19-10. Next.
- 2005 - 56-10 victory over Mike Vick and the Falcons. Now we're talking. Atlanta won 11 games and reached the NFC Championship. But...I don't feel like stopping yet.
- 2003 - Broncos (Dante's return) and Packers (OT to Kennison). Too close.
- 54-34 over the defending SB Champion Rams in 2000. Giggity.
- Hell, Joel Thorman took us all the way back to 1991 on our podcast yesterday, in the game most synonymous with the creation of the Arrowhead mystique, when the Chiefs destroyed the AFC Champion Bills on MNF.
Best Chiefs victory since - A late season 44-9 thrashing of the 11-1 San Francisco 49ers in 1998. Final answer, Regis.
Best this offense can be - You're looking at it. The most points ever scored on a Belichick coached Patriots team (41). The most yards gained in a half on any Belichick team (303). Strangely enough, Andy Reid is patrolling this offense more like the 2012 49ers than the 2013 Chiefs right now. 79 runs vs. 58 passes over the last two weeks. But that's what this offense needs to do. It's who they are. Their WRs are subpar. Their o-line has question marks, despite playing great on Monday night, but they do seem confident in run blocking. They have a top 3 RB, a triple-off-the-wall hitting backup, and two really good TEs. And Alex Smith is a much better QB when he's attempting 25 passes as opposed to 35. They've now converted on 27 of their last 48 third down attempts. And they've out-possessed teams 106:23 - 73:37 the last three weeks. Run the ball. Control the clock. Execute on third down. This is Kansas City's brand of football.
Worst coaching - Punting on 4th and short around midfield. I've killed Andy Reid for it before (along with just about every other coach who lives and breathes). Did you see what Bill Belichick did on Monday Night? Did you see it? He punted on 4th and 2 in Kansas City territory. TWICE! Guess what happened the first time? The Chiefs scored a touchdown in three plays. Three! Guess what happened the second time? Go ahead, guess. The Chiefs gained one first down and then punted. Ha, got you. Regardless, the Patriots took no risks, scored few points, and didn't take another meaningful snap in Kansas City territory the rest of the night.
Best utilization of the all reds - One game per season. That's it. Don't oversaturate it. You don't want to lose the mystique of it all. I was iffy on the game up until hearing the news on Monday. And then? Game ovah!
Best I've seen him? - Tamba Hali. It might be time to bust out the old moniker: Muhammad Hali. What a freak. All season long. I think he's been good enough to change his narrative. The narrative that Tamba is on his way out after 2014 because the team drafted Dee Ford in the first round and can save $9 million in cap room. I don't think I care anymore. He's been downright Tamba-nant at the second most important position in football. And who doesn't love receiving a fresh sack of Tamba?
Best positional upgrade from last season - Safety. We may have underestimated just how bad Kendrick Lewis was for this team last season. I feel so much more comfortable now with him gone. Ron Parker is playing like a natural safety. Husain Abdullah was the player of the game on Monday Night (leading tackler, 3 passes defensed, and a house call). Meanwhile, Eric Berry hasn't played since the first quarter of Week 2! And I gotta admit, the defense hasn't missed him. Yet.
Best tight end on the field - Travis Gron-Kelce. Do you guys know a fella by the name of Travis Kelce? Travis Kelce is a 10-foot tall beast man, who showers in vodka, and feeds his baby shrimp scampi. Did I ever tell you about the time we had a bachelor party for Travis Kelce? He ate the entire cake before we could tell him there was a stripper in it. TO TRAVIS KELCE!!!
Best Oklahoma Drill ever - Poe v. Wilfork. The results of which could be felt on the Richter Scale from Kansas to California to Alaska. Look out though. Now that he's got a taste for offense, Hungry Hungry HipPoe wants to be fed that ball. And you wouldn't like him when he's hungry.
Worst realization - The early season injuries. Honestly, they never really got to me because my expectations for this team were never that high. And yet, here we are, and I'm thinking we got a pretty damn good football team. And now thinking of the DJ injury makes me feel how Mike Catapano must've been feeling the last two months.
Best way to earn street cred - Win back to back games against teams you shouldn't beat. People watched the Chiefs boomblast the Patriots on Monday Night. Their conclusion was that New England sucks. But if KC walks into San Fran (they hate it when you call their city that) and wins, they will be taken very seriously. Three wins vs. a brutal schedule, a close loss in Denver and one serious outlier, which is looking more and more accurate by the week.
Still waiting on Joel to buy me a puppy for Monday Night's win,