/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/24831615/454302519.0.jpg)
Well, that was fun. And much needed.
Things had gotten a bit too solemn around town following the Chiefs' recent three game losing streak. Sunday, it was back to funslingin'.
Chiefs 45, Redskins 10.
This throttling served as a great reminder that the Chiefs are in the midst of an amazing season. We shouldn't fret about dropping two games to the best team in the NFL. We should be thankful the team is still in good position to do something about it.
And, in the meantime, we should enjoy beating up on nincompoops like Mike Mantanahan (looking as orange as ever, bro).
And the snow. Ohhhhh, the beautiful snow.
Who doesn't enjoy football played on Planet Hoth?
Well, maybe the players and the coaches. And the refs. Oh, and the stadium employees. The production crew. And the fans in attendance. Hmmm.
Well, forget about them. Stop being so considerate of others for just ONE second and focus on what's really important here ... me.
I got to sit on my ass all day, in front of my big honkin' HDTV, sippin' some RG-chai tea, while enjoying this gorgeous brand of football. I could watch snow football on a continuous loop for weeks on end (gonna need that yellow line, though). Hell, I'd watch just about any sport played in the snow (looking at you, WNBA).
Please, please, please give me More. Of. This. for the Super Bowl this year (if, for no other reason, so I can see more of this).
The Best & Worst w/ His Dirkness
Best team performance of the season - The Chiefs dominated all three phases of the game for both halves. You can't say that about any other game this year.
Best half of special teams ... maybe, ever? - Started off with a 33 yard FG disappearing into an abyss of snow (umm, good?). You had Dexter McPunt Returns of 60 yards, 24 yards, and 74 yards for a TD, on his way toward a new team record (set in the first half) and the seventh most punt return yards EVER. You had a Quintin "It's hard out here for a" Demps 95 yard kick return TD. And five excellently executed extra points. If only that fake FG pooch punt would've been downed inside the five! Regardless, this was the story of the game. A superior team will win 100 percent of the time with this much production from the special teams unit. So, in case any of you forgot, this is Dave Toub's world. The rest of us are just renting.
Best special teams stat - The Chiefs lead the NFL with five special teams touchdowns. They've scored so many times, you could probably put a montage together of Alex Smith celebrating the scores after thinking he's about to go on the field (squeezing that pigskin, dorky smile creeps across his face, you know the shot). Meanwhile, in a Toub-less world, there are 17 teams, more than half the league, that have none.
Worst special teams stat - The Redskins have allowed five special teams touchdowns. So they're as bad as the Chiefs are good.
Other stuff to read
Other stuff to read
Best defensive personnel - Base package. The offenses who have found success against this Chiefense - Philadelphia, Buffalo, Denver, San Diego, and Denver again - all have one thing in common: They like to spread defenses out, meaning the Chiefs spend the majority of the game in their nickel / dime package (out go Akeem Jordan and a defensive lineman, in come Marcus Cooper and Quintin Demps). In those five games, the Chiefs have allowed an average of 471 yards. In the other eight games, in which the Chiefs have relied more on their base package, they're allowing 287 yards per game.
Now, obviously those stats are skewed a bit by playing more pass happy, fast-paced teams (also playing the Broncos twice). But a near 200-yard difference between personnel reliances is noteworthy. So what does it tell me? First, the defense is better off with Eric Berry playing safety instead of linebacker. Second, the strength of the Chiefs defense might just be that stout defensive line. When Mike Da-Veto, Tyson Sacks, Saun and DontaRhinochasingdownadeeri Poe are all on the field, good things tend to happen.
Best Chiefs defense / special teams fantasy stat - They've scored 10 touchdowns on the season. In 2012, the Chiefs offense, the unit who's job it is to score touchdowns, scored 17 in the entire season.
Worst thing that could happen over the next three weeks - The offense loses its rhythm. My biggest fear. You see it all the time in the NFL playoffs with teams who clinch early. They rest their starters for a game, maybe sit out the playoff bye week, and by the time they play another meaningful game, their offense is out of sync. The Chiefs are in a unique position right now, with their offense playing the best they have all season, and three meaningless games on the horizon (they've basically clinched the No. 5 seed - it would take a specific result in nine out of nine games for the Chiefs to NOT make the playoffs). Honestly, I'm not sure of the best way to play it. Obviously, you want to avoid injury at all costs, but you want to keep that rhythm going. It's a very fine line. Not quite this fine. But fine.
Best road record in the NFL - The Kansas City Chiefs (tied with the Eagles), 5-1. A very good sign for a team who'll need to win three games on the road to make the Super Bowl (in the snow!!!).
Worst position to be put in as a fan - You watch your team lose 45-10, you know they suck, and yet you won't get to enjoy the one reward, the one silver lining that accompanies such a craptastic season - The high 1st rounder, which belongs to the Rams via the trade for RG3rd overall pick. I wouldn't have gone to the game either.
"I felt bad for those Redskins fans," my Mom said today while giving me a ride back from the car shop.
— Arrowhead Pride (@ArrowheadPride) December 9, 2013
Best catch of the day - His name. Is Logan Paulsen. And his TD catch was a beauty.
Best sign for the future - The Chiefs offensive line's play without Branden Albert. They were fantastic. No sacks. Most rushing yards of the season (193). Granted, front seven play is generally all about attitude and the Redskins had every reason to give up in that game, so there's a chance it was a fluke. But one thing I am confident of is that Donald Stephenson can play. He's now proven so at both left and right tackle. And if the team decides to re-sign Albert this offseason, I'm not sure where Stephenson fits in. Is it too early to trade Fisher? Ha, just kidding. Sort of.
Best player nobody likes to talk about - Mike DeVito. He's officially taken over as "my boy" (sorry Coop, it's not you, I just wasn't looking for anything serious). Everybody's gotta have one. The player you like more than the rest of the fan base. Mine was Wallace Gilberry for many years. And Jason Dunn before him. But DeVito is my kinda player. He doesn't like attention. He doesn't speak Swaghili. Just kicks the dude's ass in front of him and moves on to the next play. Also, I don't think it's a coincidence the defense played its worst two games of the season while he was out injured.
Best improvement to Derrick Johnson's game - His hands! How many times has DJ made that exact same play as he did yesterday, only to drop the INT? I'd guess 56 (don't ask why). And then he capped it off by lowering his shoulder right into RG3'd himself. Well done. DJ might be having the best season of his career this year. He's aging like a fine wine. Mmmm, DJ Grigio. He also got some love from Michael Strahan yesterday, who listed him as a top five candidate for NFL Defensive Player of the Year.
Best tribute - Eric Berry doing Justin Houston's sack dance, Bout to Bobble, Baby.
Best master of the custodial arts duty - Knile Davis. Actually, if everybody is so into pluralizing his first name, then I'm going to maintain the Earth's balance by singularizing his last name. Kniles Dave it is - 12 touches, 47 yards, 1 TD, and most importantly, no fumbles. And don't worry, peeing your pants is, most definitely, still cool.
Amateur Hour, Twitter, blah blah,
Dirkness