Another season. Another year mired in Midwest mediocrity. For Chiefs fans, it feels like déjà vu all over again.
It feels like déjà vu all over again.
Buffalo ought to know the feeling...
As the Offseason Blues descend upon us, we find our continued search for diversion and distraction unfulfilled. We try to feign interest in baseball or soccer, but fail. We fake enthusiasm to our friends and family, but are unsuccessful. Instead we find ourselves in the familiar position of wasting away on AP, arguing the QB, disputing what NT the Chiefs need, bickering about Clark Hunt. Feels like we been here before. Same as it ever was...
Rather than piss into the wind with the same predictable arguments, here is a way we can save both time and energy here on AP. Maybe with the efforts we save, we can finally find the cure to the Offseason Blues. Here is a list of much needed AP Keyboard Shortcuts:
[Ctrl][>][M][C] : Inserts Matt Cassel sucks comment.
[Ctrl][<][M][C] : Inserst Matt Cassel rocks comment.
[-][$] : Posts Clark Hunt is a cheap owner, don't care to win, loves soccer remark.
[P][1][2][*] : Pac-12 baller.
[M][N][?] : Enters illegible, drawn-out post with way too much lawyer jargon.
[Shift][G] : Argues why Chiefs need DeCastro
[Delete][F24] : Posts 10 FanPosts on the scrappiness of Matt Cassel.
[Alt][C][n][C] : Random Canadian inside-joke generator.
[Ctrl][H][2][E] : Places offensive comment that would get most users banned.
[CapsLock][!] : Slaps the toughest guy you know.
[Insert][4][2][0]: Unnecessary drug reference.
[Insert][.] : ‘Nuff said. Period. Done. End of discussion.
[+][K][C] : Kool-aid post
[-][K][C] : Hater post
If some of the Arrowhead Pride nerds can program the site with these short cuts, no longer will we have to waste time repeating the same arguments, and perhaps finally we can break the monotony that is the NFL offseason. Seems like years we have been having the same arguments. Is it 2007 or 2012? Hard to tell. Release the chain.
Fans of the Buffalo Bills must understand the colorlessness of the break. Much like KC, Buffalo is also entangled in mediocrity, and again finds themselves with a high first round pick. As the Chiefs and Bills prepare for the annual meeting (it's a yearly thing now, right?). We can examine the Bills roster and notice the similarities of our teams and our cities.
For Buffalo, it's real simple. Bills need a left tackle. Just so happens LT is the most important position on the field. Without beef, makes no difference who else you got. With beef, you can play Thigpen at QB. Added to the fact that Fitzy got paid, Chan Gailey has to protect his boy and give his playmakers a chance. Really only two options. Not sold on alligator arm Reily Reiff, so come step....
Jonathan Martin, OT. Stanford.
6'5", 312 pounds. Along with David DeCastro, and Coby Fleener, Martin carried Andrew Luck to the No. 1 pick. With an O-line like Stanford's, Tyler Palko would look like Aaron Rodgers. Mashed as a 3-year starter in the Pac-12, facing NFL-caliber defenders each week. Smart player from an NFL system. Coached by NFL coaches. More of a finesse blocker than a mauler, but you know Chan loves the razzle-dazzle, even from his O-line. Got the quickness and first-step to be an elite LT. Has proven to be coachable and willing to work on his game.
Buffalo could use another WR to go with KC's favorite, Stevie Johnson. Chan coached Megatron at Georgia Tech, and Stephen Hill looks to be this year's v2.0. He'll be tempted, no doubt, but no sense taking a WR without having the stud LT.
As Buffalo fans and KC fans alike chant the same mantra, "Next year's our year", let us all work together to break the dreariness and monotony of the offseason. Mock drafts can keep us distracted for a few minutes, but there are still 5 months to go. Let us remove ourselves from the hamster wheel and enjoy Jah creation. Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery, for none but ourselves can free our minds.
DREAD OUT