Chiefs Vs. Bears: The Best And The Worst

Well, that was...something.

After a game like that, I can't help but think of the missed opportunities of the past few weeks. I mean, if the Chiefs had executed a simple Hail Mary pass against the Steelers, they'd be sitting at 6-6 right now.

Oh well, no sense crying over bent fingers.

Worst coaching move - Electing to attempt a Hail Mary pass, bypassing a 55-yard field goal from our top offensive weapon, Ryan Succop, on the last play of the first half. Seriously, you have to take the opportunity for points there right? Besides, Palko could never throw the ball 45 yards! Wait a tick...

HE DID WHAT?!?

Best Hail Mary execution I've ever seen - Dexter McCluster. He knew exactly what he was doing on that play, running directly in front of the Bears mccluster of players to set up camp underneath and wait for the tip. It was clear that the Chiefs had practiced that play and were very schooled on their assignments.

Worst retort - It wasn't as clear that the other 69 offensive plays had been practiced.

Lets thump this one out like Terrence Copper...

The Best and Worst w/ His Dirkness:

Best reality check we could ask for -The biggest difference between those two teams yesterday was a completed Hail Mary pass. Seriously, that's it. Those were two identical teams out there slap-scuffling it out (which is great news - get to that soon). With both starting QB's out, Caleb Hanie was every bit as bad as Tyler Palko (and I'd argue even worse). The two teams' best players are their bookend pass rushers, Julius Peppers and Tamba Hali. Matt Forte got the McGahee treatment (take a seat next to McFadden, Moreno, and even McGahee himself on the Chiefs' hit list) a la Jamaal Charles 10 weeks ago. Devin Hester and Dexter McCluster are every bit as equal (what? ...what?). Alright, alright, here's the good news of all of this - the Chiefs really aren't that far off. This same Bears team hosted an NFC Championship Game last year. They might have challenged the Packers this year until the big guy upstairs saw Tebow and the Broncos on their schedule and elected to strike down upon da Bears with great vengeance and furious anger. Which brings us full circle, back to Matt Cassel and Jay Cutler, who will forever be linked because of Josh McDingleberries. I have the two QB's separated by precisely 12 rungs on the NFL's totem pole, which means the Chiefs are no more than an upgrade at the QB position away from becoming a perennial contender themselves. This is the year, Chiefs. Take a chance and grab your guy. Do whatever it takes. This city is aching for it.

Best hope for next season - Fielding a legitimate top five NFL defense. Anybody else get the feeling that they could have elongated that game another 30 minutes and the Bears still wouldn't have been able to score a TD? Incredible performance out of the defense. 0-11 on third downs. Seven sacks. 181 total yards. Three picks. The emergence of Justin Houston is BY FAR the biggest development of this season's latter half. He was, quite simply, an animal yesterday (seven tackles, three sacks, another two hits on the QB, and a forced fumble). It's almost hard for me to hold back on my excitement for how dynamic he makes the Chiefs defense. Get Eric Berry back on the field (sure as heckfire hope that he's able to return at 100 percent), re-sign Brandon Carr (anybody else see him signaling dollar signs after his extraordinary INT?), and keep adding beef to that line. Oh, and most importantly, keep Romeo Crennel around. He is the team's MVP of this season. I'm in favor of keeping Todd Haley around for another year, if only for the fact that it keeps Crennel locked on at defensive coordinator (he might feel spurned if they fire Haley and don't hire him as head honcho).

Worst hope for next season - Anything involving Bill Muir. This guy apparently doesn't even know how to properly speak into his microphone (You get the feeling he and Haley despise one another the way they bicker back and forth like that). However, while he may be responsible for some of our offense's ineptitude, I don't necessarily blame him. It's like blaming Tyler Palko (yeah he's not good, we get it). I blame the people who hired him. I'm sorry, but you don't hire old guys who have never called plays before as your offensive coordinator. You need an innovative thinker. Honestly, I'd rather the Chiefs hire a 19-year old whiz kid as offensive coordinator than a 69-year old fart. (No offense, Bill.) He's in a gotsta go situation.

Best headline of the game - BEWARE OF THOMAS JONES! And how. Despite posting 36 yards on 16 carries yesterday (a rock solid 2.3 per carry), the consensus of my viewing party was that that was one of The Wasted Down's best games of the season.

Worst in-game rant - Solomon Wilcots' obsession with the Bears' safeties' ability to tackle. I mean really TACKLE. Did you see that tackle? Look at that wrap up! Some serious tackling going on out there. And I usually like Solomon, although I might just be fooled by his kick-ass name.

Best way to find yourself on the bench - Inexplicably pull on a passing play, leaving an enormous gap that leads directly to a Palko cleanup on aisle four. Lookin' at you, Lilja.

Best offensive performance - Branden Albert. Back to back weeks for the much-maligned left tackle. Last week, James Harrison, this week Julius Peppers. Come to think of it, I don't remember hearing Andre Carter's name much either. Bring on Clay Matthews baby!

Best snatch of the day - Dwayne Bowe Hungry, Hungry Hippo'ing his fumble back into his body.

Best snag of the day - Jon McGrawnolds. Clearly more snag than snatch.

Best random stopover of a career - Kyle Orton's one pass, two night stay in Kansas City. It does not get any better than that. He can't play another down as a Chief. It's too poetic as it is. I feel like I could write a full length screenplay on that single play (entitled "The Flea Finger"). You think having Amani Toomer around for a training camp seems weird? Give it five years and then start reminiscing over The Kyle Orton Era. It'll make Jerry Rice's stop in Denver seem normal.

Best part of the Kyle Orton era - My brother, who's been clamoring for Kyle Orton since before anybody, restarted his cable box (with hopes of curing the awful audio feed from CBS) only to receive a few texts of straight laughter (including me) while it reset. Unknowingly, he had missed the entirety of what has come to be known as The Kyle Orton Era. Sad day for all us N'eards out there. RIP.

Worst execution that ultimately proved harmless - Giving Devin Hester a chance to return a punt with under 15 seconds left in the game. That ball shouldn't have remained in the field of play. I can't figure out why Hester didn't even field it (it was in the end zone, but he has a better shot of going 100+ than the Bears offense did of going 80 yards). Outside of that, Colquitt was dropping bombs all game long, and was a major key to the victory.

Best trend going - The Chiefs from one month to the next. 0-3 in September. 4-0 in October. 0-4 in November. 1-0 in December.

Worst part about the win - The Chiefs probably knocked themselves out of the Matt Barkley sweepstakes (barring a trade). This only upsets me because I had begun to evaluate Matt The Hoople and was seriously impressed. However, the feeling of a win greatly overpowers relying on a 21-year old unknown who may or may not even be in this year's draft. It's cool, I'll settle for a pissed off Peyton Manning.

Worst thing that we'll all inevitably watch tonight - Jared Gaither starting at left tackle for the San Diego Chargers. And the Chiefs never even gave him a shot at unseating the astonishingly bad Barry Richardson.

My six cents: If any of you think Alabama is more deserving than Oklahoma State, after already having played and lost to LSU at home, then I don't like you. Cheers y'all.

His Dirkness