Oh look at the rest of the AFC West cower at our mightily improved front office.
We're as happy as anyone about the Haley signing, but uh, dude, what about the defense? We've got blue chip offensive HC, a semi-functional creative offensive scheme and OC potentially carrying over, two top "heralded" scouting minds, but defensively the tank is well past "E" and its February.
These Crennel rumors have us pretty excited because we thought he was actually a pretty decent head coach for a Cleveland organization whose reputation possibly isn't as maligned as it should be (Phil Savage going Christian Bale on a fan, Kellen Winslow disgracing the good name of Yahoo! Fantasy Football endorsements, the Brady Quinn competition with Matt Leinart for most overhyped aborted QB stardom, and generally putting the Mangini horse before the Pioli cart in the recent off season).
Of course we were pretty excited about the Shanahan rumors too, after the break we'll breakdown some of the fortunate landmines avoided.
It was weird trying not to hate the orangeness for a few weeks there, spray tan jokes? Intact.
Most gravitate to the skillful placement of the horns in this picture, we're gonna suggest this scenario: could you imagine supporting that D-bag goatee as the figurehead of the Chiefs? *Shudders*
Terrifying Josh McDanials, terrifying.
How is Denver not slightly concerned that we got a limb of that Coaching tree, where they're following this particular root:
Now, Crennel at DC, well...
We think that's a mustache we can all believe in.
All in all, we guess we're okay, it's just disconcerting with with how content people are with such a gaping need still out there. So far Pioli and Haley are great, and the PARADE respects this slow and steady style, but that's easy to project without playing any games so far.
Moreover, the offseason is just hugely depressing, all we get to do is sit around and come up with funny things to say about what the new GM and HC look like (preferably less retarded than Whitlock's MLB *blurp*). Tony Soprano and Ray Liotta aren't bad comparisons, but Haley's tough to nail down, maybe Ray Liotta meets Ray Romano and a little Reece Bobby crossed with Roberto Benigni?
Screw it, the side by side picture montage was taking too long so instead let's all have a laugh at great big fat new Raider's head coach Tom Cable:
Don't worry AFC West potential future failures, you won't be lonely...
Non-Gametime Snack of the Week
Devils on horseback are a hot appetizer or savoury.
Recipes vary but in general they are a 'darker' (and cheaper) version of angels on horseback. Most recipes contain a pitted prune (though dates are sometimes used) stuffed with mango chutney and wrapped in bacon. This is then baked in the oven and quite often served on toast, with watercress.
Other recipes stuff the prune with cheese in place of the mango chutney. Other versions again use liver pieces in place of the prunes.
Hot pepper sauce is often added.
In the UK, 'devils on horseback' also sometimes refers to pigs in blankets.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, wikipedia (cred. to Phil Collins for the shitty alliteration) but this prunes and mango chutney is for twinkle-toed limeys. It's almonds stuffed in dates, wrapped in bacon and with a toothpick through, them.
Sue us Martha, we dare you...
Don't know if it ever reopened, I remember some rumors about it closing, but local KC brewery Flying Monkey put out some legit products and sponsored an old boys lacrosse club, which was cool of them too.
Just in case it doesn't exist here's a back-up:
Very, very good AND over something 7.1% ABV nice, no?
Not something that will blow your mind, but Bill Hader Straigh Owning the rest of the SNL Cast:
Christ, its going to be a long off-season isn't it.