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Q&A With TKC

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For the uninitiated, TKC stands for Tony's Kansas City, the most updated and witty blog about Kansas City out there. Look around at some of the local KC sites you may visit. I bet TKC is linked on there. Tony was kind enough to answer a few random questions about Chiefs' football and he approached them with the same gusto as he would a Johnson County housewife thats north of 103rd St. Younger readers, shy your eyes and don't click read more. For everyone else, enjoy and make sure you make TKC a regular read. I certainly do.

How big a sports fan are you?

I'm only 5'11 but I keep getting fatter because beer is delicious. Badump-bump-bump.

Really, I stopped actively following sports after high school but I find that it helps to have stuff to talk about with strangers, which is always useful when your buddy is trying to steal their car. To be honest, I only follow the Chiefs because if you ask 10 people about the team in KC you're going to get 30 different opinions. Like it or not (I don't) they're part of the culture here in KC and stories of their fate are almost like a shared language among people who live around these parts.

What are you thoughts on the improbable playoff run by the Chiefs?

Well, you probably read that story of how a 10 buck bet would/might have paid off 7k if you parlayed all of the cash. However, for some reason it doesn't strike me as weird given I've always believed this town is doomed to be within the grasp of greatness and then fail miserably which only makes things worse. On the other hand . . . Eh, it's football, it's a game and teams lose. It's not like anybody figured out how to stop violence in Iraq or how to keep Capt'n Crunch from cutting the roof of your mouth.

Where will you be at gametime?

Banging the wife of some guy at a sports bar.

Actually, I watch the games with my Dad at his house, so we'll both be banging her.

I kid, I kid, I actually rob the houses of people in Johnson County during game time so I'll be moving around rather quickly.

What Chiefs player would you like least to be locked in a prison cell with?

Doesn't really matter to me since, like Larry Johnson, most of them are only experienced at fighting women.

Was there ever a time in your life when you think you could out drink Jared Allen?

I don't know, the guy has a lot of money so I'm guessing he drinks the good stuff. Whereas I'm broke and always have been. While I don't really drink to often now, back in the day I used to get down with Colt .45 and St. Ides which is really the equivalent of drinking paint thinner. Also, I'm guessing that Allen's drinking ability is just about as overrated as his play. Truth be known, he's probably a "girl drink drunk" and the only reason he was caught was because he left a trail of those little plastic umbrellas in his wake. Also, I've heard that some law enforcement officials estimate that for every time you're caught on a DWI/DUI you probably did it at least a dozen times before . . . So it's nice to know that Jackson County taxpayers will be paying for the team for more than a generation and as a repayment we're only guaranteed that KC's streets will be that much more dangerous when the home team decides to party.