FanPost

We shall bathe in your tears of joy

After literally years of toiling over posts and paradebulations we've only been able to make one lasting mark on the arrowhead pride community. Painstakingly convoluted prose with top-tier third-level joke pyramiding just doesn't have the gravitational force that is a tattoo of a dolphin smoking a bong in a recliner.

In addition to being the stupidest mascot in the NFL, it also is the only thing that truly makes you happy dear reader. As the great philosopher Sheryl Crow once taught us, well then, it can't be that bad.

Here you go you animals, and if anyone knows who stole the face plate off the radio of a 1995 red lebaron convertible, we would like it back.*


Normal_ivqu-dolphinunicorn_medium

via www.vampireposers.com

Oh we will vampire posers, we, will.  [Dream of finding Dolphicornmaid, chased]

Dolphin-tattoo-pictures2-e1298618354516_medium

via www.fashionclothingtoday.com

What's cool is that now we know for a certainty someone uttered some variation of this sentence:

"Yeah, but he's an actual dolphin, and I want him to have one of those breath right strips."

Doesn't a dolphin breath through... You know what? Screw it, let's do this.

Bride_medium

via www.dolphinreef.co.il

But what if they're getting DOLPHIN GAY MARRIED!?!?!

Image_php_medium

via www.attractionsbook.com

Of course you exist.

Dolphin_medium

via harpursbizarre.files.wordpress.com

The hand is what confuses us.  Is that a gorilla paw?

Dolphin-with-hat-glasses-and-pipe-john-drysdale-200024_medium

via 1.bp.blogspot.com

Before photoshop people actually did this. And what's more, it was probably funnier to see the process of actually doing it. Now some dork just clicks a plastic thing. The dude who did this probably attached that hat with drywall screws whilst smoking unfiltered lucky strikes. What a badass, we bet that pipe is fully functional too.

Slothy-dolphin_medium

via www.goddamnlazybastards.com

See above, idiot.

Il_570xn

via img2.etsystatic.com

Is formal shark "western" or "old tymey" formal?

Dolphin_beer_medium

via m.fecalface.com

Despite the URL we'd hang this on our wall.

Ecco_front_medium

via mashthosebuttons.com

"Hey kids we've harnessed the incredible power of the computer chip and made it reasonably possible for you to actually play video games on a television in your own home! Now, ..., who wants to pretend they're a dolphin?"

Mraz-dolphin_medium

via cdn2.mamapop.com

Jason Mraz dolphin, THIS is a dangerous liaison. To repeat, Jason Mraz dolphin.

Dolphin_shake_medium

via www.tinygif.com

You're having a seizure and it's an earthquake.

 

 

*Yes Jon Voight's LeBaron, congrats chucklehead.

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Arrowhead Pride's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Arrowhead Pride writers or editors.

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