Scene: Arrowhead conference room, the coaches are gathered to start the game planning for the Baltimore Ravens.
Tod Haley: "Well that Oakland game really sucked. We looked like a bunch of grade schoolers out there.
We have to plan a better plan this week." All the coaches look at each other in shock!
Charlie Weis: "BUT......"
Romeo Crennel: "Now wait one minute....."
Steve Hoffman: "Crap Todd......"
Maurice Carthon: "Fricken Nitwit....."
Emmitt Thomas just gives Haley the "O" face.
Nick Sirianni turns green
Todd Haley stares hard back at everyone babbling on then yells: "Shut the Fuck up!"
Silence ensues as the coaches shake their heads.
Todd continues: "It was a poor plan, no adjustments, no wrinkles (glares at Charlie), no nothing.
The team seemed leaderless and flat. Just what was that all about?"
All the coaches stand up and pull up their shirts and display bandages as one.
Todd Haley: "So!" Todd stands up and pulls up his shirt and shows them his bandage. "Me too."
Charlie Weis: "Well, Todd I told you it was a dumb idea to require ALL of us to have appendectomies."
Todd: "Hey, I couldn't afford to let any emergencies pop up during the Playoffs. Could I?"
Romeo Crennel: "I think you went over board with poor Nick! A Gall Bladder removal and Appendectomy too."
Todd: "Hehe, He did get a discount on the procedures....."
Maurice Carthon: "Todd, that was a fucked up idea!" Todd: "Shut your face Mo..."
Steve Hoffman: "No, I agree, poor Nick is having flashbacks now of surgery wards."
Todd: "Nick will be alright, when he is the OC, I don't want no Emergencies messing up the gameplans."
Nick goes from green to beaming.
Todd: "Nick, I got you scheduled for a vasectomy after the season is over."
Nick goes from beaming to green again.
Todd: "Well, if everybody is done bitching now, What can we do to the Ravens this Sunday?"
Charlie: "I hear Raven is excellent Baked with Butter and Button Mushrooms?"
Romeo: "No, Raven has got to be fried and served with Mashed Potatoes and Gravy?"
Steve: "I like my Raven Raw wrapped in a Sushi roll with that Chinese Hot Mustard?"
Charlie: "Hehe, I got an AK-47. We can get enough for all of us!"