Nickname the Chiefs Offensive Line!
by kcisbetterthanstlateverything on Sep 1, 2009 10:37 PM CDT
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Like any famous, or infamous in this case, group goes, a nickname must be given. It's a sports rule or something. As we know, our line is awful. Over the last few years, with the retirements and departures of Will Shields, Willie Roaf, and Casey Wiegmann, our line has turned a perennially dominant five man blocking unit (we had several streaks of starting 5 linemen extending more than one season, which is rare) into a carousel that has turned the record setting LJ into Jamal Lewis and sent many QBs to the injured lists. But if this preseason is any indication, the 2009 incarnation of the Chiefs line could take this level of suck to a new and expensive low.
Before we actually get to some nickname suggestions, I'll give some famous group nicknames in football history.
The Four Horsemen (Notre Dame stars Harry Stuhldreher, Don Miller, Jim Crowley, and Elmer Layden)
The Fearsome Foursome (L.A. Rams line of Rosey Grier, Lamar Lundy, Merlin Olsen, and Deacon Jones)
The Purple People Eaters (Vikings line of Alan Page, Carl Eller, Jim Marshall, and Gary Larsen)
The No-Name Defense (Undefeated Dolphins defense of 1972)
The Steel Curtain (1970s Steelers defense that produced 4 Super Bowl wins)
The Orange Crush (Broncos defense that did not manage to win a Super Bowl but did earn a nickname)
The Hogs (The big uglies that paved the way for John Riggins and the physical Redskins teams of the 80s and early 90s)
via nothingfancy1.files.wordpress.com
The Triplets (The self-proclaimed stars of an offense that was ACTUALLY good because of its line)
The Greatest Show on Turf (St. Louis Rams 1999-2001)
via www.nflfans.com
Now for some negative nicknames, because, after all, that's what we're looking at here.
The Ain'ts (New Orleans Saints, 1967-present, zero Super Bowl appearances or wins)
via www4.pictures.gi.zimbio.com
The Bungles (Cincinnati Bengals 1968-present, NFL laughingstock since 1991)
The Lambs (Post-Kurt Warner Rams-present)
The Chefs (That's great, but who are the Chefs?....I expect my check in the mail Snickers)
via sixfourthreeblog.files.wordpress.com
My suggestions (FINALLY I'm sure some of you, if you made it, are thinking), which aren't all that great; but, whatever.
The French Resistance: a lot of talk until the fighting starts
The Blocking Dummies: obviously a joke because our line does not block much at all
The Fall Out Boys: these guys are an intimidating bunch
Cassel's Penetrable Wall: other teams only need to look at our line to find the way through
The Chef Salads: mostly because it's different everywhere you go, but still a general wussy dish
The Red Light District: this is what our running backs see as they approach the line of scrimmage, and really, our line is really just a playground for the drunken imaginations of opposing defenses, just to satisfy the Amsterdam reference
The Red Blush: soft, revealing, attractive...this is what defenses see
The Red Herrings: our line really is good at hiding the rest of the problems our team has
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The Gingers: South Park's soul-less, dumb, and problematic bunch....the world must be rid of them according to Eric Cartman.
via z.about.com
The Red-Headed Sluts: Our line could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch!
No offense to women; it's just a drink.
I encourage everyone to try a nickname, because this group is so bad we might have a full roster of skill players injured by the bye week.
This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Arrowhead Pride's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Arrowhead Pride writers or editors.
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Swiss Cheese
Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!
Albert and the Matadors
Waters could sing bass.
by stram#1 on Sep 1, 2009 10:58 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
So what're you sayin'?
The fellas dodge the charging bull and shout “O’le!” as our QB gets his ass handed to him?
Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!
Then they strut while flowers are thrown onto the field
"The first step to penetration... must not be lateral"
-Confucius, in contrary to Glenn Dorsey lining up in the 2-tech
slappin da bass
"The spirit, the will to win, and the will to excel are the things that endure. These qualities are so much more important than the events that occur." - Vince Lombardi
The I-70 Line
The best way to get east to west or vice versa at Arrowhead
Let's Kick some ASS in 09 or Die trying
or "the 53"
this is the best that 53 O-line players tried out could come up with
Let's Kick some ASS in 09 or Die trying
by Steve_Chiefs on Sep 1, 2009 11:04 PM CDT up reply actions
I don't have a nickname for the OLine....
But if our QB is Jodie Foster, the opposing DLine is the entire cast from the Bar scene in The Accused.
"The first step to penetration... must not be lateral"
-Confucius, in contrary to Glenn Dorsey lining up in the 2-tech
The Ozone Layer
(because it has holes in it)
Rectal Froth
by The Donger on Sep 1, 2009 11:29 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
How about "Rectal Froth"?
Rectal Froth
by The Donger on Sep 1, 2009 11:29 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
No Browns fans
If your a fan of another team teasing ours then your just an ass…… jk lol
Time is a great teacher... unfortunately it kills all it's pupils.
The Awffense
Yeah, let's just keep matriculatin' the ball down the field, boys! ...
by oldchiefsfan on Sep 2, 2009 12:55 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
How about D lines playground?
I’m surprised nobody has said simply the offensive line.. Cuz their play is down right offensive.
Time is a great teacher... unfortunately it kills all it's pupils.
Off-the-Street Fighters
Just to irritate and motivate Waters one more time with the “22 players off the street” comment.
The Red Carpet?
Don't forget to be an AP-vangelist...Tell A Friend...
by woodman212 on Sep 2, 2009 1:43 AM CDT reply actions 4 recs
He'll be here all week
Try the veal.
"The first step to penetration... must not be lateral"
-Confucius, in contrary to Glenn Dorsey lining up in the 2-tech
I like it
haha leads straight to the Cassel hahaha
Time is a great teacher... unfortunately it kills all it's pupils.
The Red Carpet
This is simple yet effective…Much like the O-line should be… I LIKES
Winner!!!
simple to the point and memorable
by bringbackcarl on Sep 3, 2009 12:49 PM CDT up reply actions
hopefully our defensive line turns into the red light district
saying to opposing offenses….. sorry bitches, this is our hood and all the lights are red….. so u ain’t going nowhere
Mike Jacobs.... I hope your bat has as much lift as your hair does.....
O-Line
The nO-line, The Piglets (reference the Hogs).
John Soellner
My nickname
I really like the French Resistance but I think the best way to describe them is:
The Pumice Line or TPL for short.
Why should they be called this, well lets at what Pumice is desecribed as.
“Easily the most porous rock, so much so that it can actually float on water”
“Pumice is considered a glass because it has no crystal structure”
“Pumice is a common product of explosive eruptions (or blocking breakdowns)
"I will fight you!"
"What is your weapon?"
"My bare hands!"
"That is stupid. I will use a sword and I will cut off your bare hands."
You can actually
gouge you thumb nail into pumice, and it’s amazingly light, like Styrofoam.
The Redwood Forest.
Get lost in the Redwood Forest!
by chicks_love_chiefs on Sep 2, 2009 9:02 AM CDT reply actions
How about
Osmosis
Defined: Osmosis is the diffusion of water through a semi-permeable membrane
by KCSatchmo on Sep 2, 2009 10:30 AM CDT reply actions
I'm Down For fall Out Boys
because it describe how they play
Touchdown
Kan..Sa...CITY
-Mitch Holthus
The butt bagger boys
as much as they get their butts handed to them they are going to need a big sac, and one for the Qb’s as well.
"The Red White and Through"
Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
by BigRedChief on Sep 2, 2009 12:24 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
"Sackagaweas"
Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.
by BigRedChief on Sep 2, 2009 12:26 PM CDT reply actions 2 recs
Very Fitting, humm, hummf.....SUCCESS!!!!
The Sack-A-Gaweas.
Dude it is perfect
1.) It describes their play,
2.) It takes a shot at their Pride
3.) It stays True to our Indian Connection.
I Love It. someone send this To ESPN, Whitlock, SI, Dammit.
Touchdown
Kan..Sa...CITY
-Mitch Holthus
by 90,32,58,31,16 on Sep 2, 2009 12:36 PM CDT up reply actions
The red scare
those damn commies brainwashed our line into thinking a sack is good.
Custer's Redemption....
…as in, General Custer…“Custer’s Last Stand?” Get it?
Sorry, this one may be pretty lame…not trying to be politically incorrect or offend anyone…but I couldn’t help it.
I guess this would only work if Warpaint was still our mascot and not a wolf.
I carry a lighter around in my pocket wherever I go...I don't smoke, I just really like certain songs.
BLOODY BROTHEL!
Well the name I suggest should say it all. A big red mess with a lot of ho’s in it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (BLOODY BROTHEL!) Who has a better on than that?? NO ONE!
Once... Twice...
Five tiiiiimes a ladyyyy…
"The first step to penetration... must not be lateral"
-Confucius, in contrary to Glenn Dorsey lining up in the 2-tech
Ladies in Red
They’re just out there dancin… cheek to cheek…
"The first step to penetration... must not be lateral"
-Confucius, in contrary to Glenn Dorsey lining up in the 2-tech
For an history buffs on AP.
Playing off some of the others above, could try either…
The Maignot Line (French fortifications built between WWI and WWII, which the Germans simply went around, ala our line).
Or start calling the QB Custer and the line the 7th Cavalry.
the french resistence
is really good. makes gun of two culture groups at once (i consider the chiefs a culture group)
I don't think
Homosexuals are considered a culture group.
(Slam against the French there.)
Rectal Froth
ShieldZero maybe?
After all, they can’t shield the quarterback from ANYTHING.
The good thing about hope is, its well never runs dry.
The French Resistence
was actually very effective at it’s objective, to harass the German army and tie up their resources. it was the French army that has had it’s ass kicked on a regular basis since the Russians gave Napoleon a beat down at waterloo.
holy rollers
defense run throught the holes and our guys are rolling on their backs
FOUR F'S FIND UM FEEL UM FUGUM FORGET UM.
Niswanger & Goff apparently are the Dynamic Duo
Holy haberdashery, Batman!
Negative Ghost Rider the pattern is full...
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