There have already been some astounding changes made within the walls of One Arrowhead Drive. But there are still a few more things I wouldn't mind seeing happen. Here are my suggestions to the ones in charge.
1. Have Todd Haley wear a suit to one of the home games. Jack Del Rio did a few years ago in Jacksonville. Mike Nolan did it too in San Francisco. I think it's classy and it's kind of a throwback: almost like a tribute to the coaches of old who wore them. And also, when Del Rio and Nolan wore them, they won their game.
2. The Chiefs need to have at least one game where they sport a black jersey. We've already mentioned it a few times here on AP and its a good idea. On the same day, have the fans wear black shirt and have the opponents endure a Blackout. Just like the Georgia-Alabama game (except Alabama won that game so lets try to win our Blackout game).
3. Bowe needs to go all Joe Horn and have a touchdown celebration. I think celebrations are hilarious. Put a phone in the goal post and call someone when he scores a touchdown. Do putt-putt golf on a pylon. Something. Anything.
4.Have some of the hot wives of the Chiefs players come out and blow kisses to the camera. Maybe pull a Palin and wink. Yum!
5.Since Chiefs & Chopper has been discontinued, its time to get some new sponsorship. Bazookas should be a key sponsor. Chiefs N Zookas! Chiefs N Zookas! Then one of the dancers will appear on the Jumbotron and say something like "The Chiefs and the girls at Bazookas share something in common: we both love to score!" Just imagine the excitement. Men will cheer, wives will be disgusted and leave them and I'll swoop in to console them. Everybody wins.
6. When Oakland comes into town, it should officially be declared "Beat The Hell Out Of A Raiders Fan" Day. If some toolbag Raiders fan comes to the game, it should be acceptable for someone to toss water balloons and tomatoes at him/her. If he tries to start a fight, a three man whiffle ball bat squad comes in and just started clobbering him. Whoever is in the section of the beatdown gets a free T-shirt after the game.
7. We need to add more cool kiosks inside the stadium. Tired of $9 beer? Forget about it. Go down to the Gates BBQ kiosk and get yourself a Jager Bomb. Are you tired of hot dogs? Hooters Wings kiosks. Have you already seen countless pictures of Chiefs cheerleaders? Then we go back to the players' hot wives and get giant pin-up posters of them. Yeah!
8. The Chiefs cheerleaders need some new music. Instead of dancing to Black Betty, give the girls a change of pace and let them dance to something like Pitbull - "Bojangles". Seriously - go onto youtube and and watch that video. If our cheerleaders danced like the girls in that videos, I'd be a season ticket holder in a heartbeat.
9. When the Chiefs play the Eagles this year, a group of Chiefs fans need to go to the game in Philly and start chanting SUCK IT PHILLY! (The idea comes from an episode of HBO's The Life & Times of Tim).
10. Before the first game of the season at Arrowhead starts, have Scott Pioli come out of the entrance tunnel. He should wear a white suit and have doves come flying out of his sleeves. Then he should magically levitate. It would kinda be like a Puff Daddy music video minus the lame sunglasses.
Is there any chance of this becoming a reality? Probably not. But if you are reading this right now, Scott Pioli, do me a favor and at least think about it.