AP Power Rankings Week 9: Better Late Than Never Edition

Welcome to Week 9 of your AP Power Rankings. We are a little late in the posting this week due to the fact that my boss demanded I actually do a little work. Sorry for the delay but what better to spice up your Friday afternoon than a subjective, collective opinion of 10 guys you’ve never met about the NFL? We have a lot to talk about this week but first we would like you to read the following;

AP Power Rankings

Winners have girlfriends.

***Arrowhead Pride***

Losers get together in little groups

with folks they met on the internet

and make arbitrary rankings of

professional football teams.

Now that we’ve got the new signage out of the way onward we go. The Saints have a strangle hold on our top spot sporting a shiny 1.2 average vote with all the panelists except Banksy giving them the nod as the best team playing.  Banksy likes Payton Manning and his Colts in the #1 slot and really, what is not to like? The Colts could very well meet the Saints in the Super Bowl but we get ahead of ourselves. There are a few teams that may have something to say about a Saints, Colts Super Bowl. The Denver Donkeys finally touched down to earth but they are still a formidable opponent. Many still don’t believe the Donks are for real but they will have a chance to silence all critics when they take on the Pittsburgh Steelers this Sunday. Until then, they are #4 in our rankings. Rounding out the top 5 are the Vikes at #3 and the Pats holding steady at #5.

Biggest jump this week went to the Ravens and Titans leaping 4 spots and the Epic Fail Award goes to the Cards tumbling 6 slots after their loss to the Panthers.

Enjoy the return of the Chiefs folks and enjoy the rankings.

1. Saints (1.2)

Another week, another win and based on their upcoming schedule now the first would be loss may not be for another three weeks.

2. Colts (1.9)

The D is under rated and they always seem to find a way to win the game. This is a balanced, strong team.

3. Vikings (2.9)

Brett Favre after the game:"I said beating the Packers wasn't about revenge. Well I changed my mind again…People of Green Bay, you can drink my warm Mississippi ball sweat"

4. Donkeys (4.7)

The Broncos finally fall and return home for a Monday Night challenge, the Steelers of Pittsburgh.

5. Patriots (5.1)

Week 8 was a bye week and they are looking good. They play the Phins next. Can they stop the wildcat this time?

6. Steelers (6.4)

If Big Ben keeps up this pace the rest of the AFC should be very, very worried.

7. Bengals (6.7)

The return of Palmer has been huge for the Bengals.

8. Eagles (7.6)

Big win last week. They own the toughest division in football.

9. Cowboys (8.9)

Miles Austin has proven to be a stud. Roy Williams is looking like a goat in Dallas.

10. Ravens (10.5)

The Ravens have put the Steelers and Bengals on notice. This is a 3 horse race.

11. Giants (11.9)

Think they miss Steve Spagnuolo now? Or maybe they just miss competent players in their secondary.

12. Falcons (12.4)

The Falcons are finally ending up around where they belong in the Power Ranking. This is a good team but there are still a lot of holes and they have been able to beat elite competition this year.

13. Texans (12.4)

They will miss Daniels but this team will be in it all the way to the end.

14. Packers (14.5)

Classy move Lambeau. Boo the best player any of you have ever seen because your GM's ego got in the way and he went and found a new gig. Maybe he should have worried less about pissing off Favre and built an O Line

15. Cardinals (14.8)

Whisenhunt to Warner, "WE HAVE BIRDS ON THE SIDE OF OUR HELMET!!! for the fifth %$&# time!!!!

16. Chargers (16.3)

Can San Diego sneak into the Big Apple and do more harm to what seems to be the sleeping Giants? They still have Norv Turner, so no, probably not.

17. Bears (17.1)

Interesting fantasy football stat. This week the Bears Defense netted 33 points. Last week they got -1

18. Dolphins (17.5)

Beat their division rivals the Jets again. Now they head against another division rival, the Pats.

19. Jets (18.4)

Apparently Sanchez forgot to eat his lunch again. Or the Jets just couldn't capitalize against the Dolphins.

20. 49ers (19.3)

Give credit where credit is due. It took the mighty Colts whipping out the green notebook to beat them. The NFC West is within reach.

21. Panthers (21.6)

Power running game once again leads them to a win. Without Stewart and Williams this team would be challenging division mate Tampa for worst team in football.

22. Jaguars (22.1)

Tough loss to the Titans. This tea needs a new coach.

The Following teams belong to the newly formed AP Power Rankings "Pittsburgh Pirates Division" In a tribute to the most consistently bad baseball team ever, these bottom 10 teams are so bad that none of them have a single player that Dan Snyder would over pay for in free agency…well except for #24. 

The Pittsburgh Pirates Division

23. Bills (22.4)

At least they can't lose on their bye week coming up.

24. Seahawks (24.1)

If St. Louis can beat Detroit, so can we...can't we?

25. Redskins (25.6)

I don't even need to change this comment…it should just permanently be "Team in shambles."

26. Raiders (26.7)

Going into their bye week, Tom Cable meets with Al Davis to "discuss" Cable's past history of domestic violence. I'm sure the overhead projector is ready to rumble for another press conference and JaMarcus Russell will blame someone, for something, somewhere.

27. Titans (27)

Dynamic back with Chris Johnson. This team could still win 6 or 7 games.

28. Chiefs (27.5)

Coming off the bye week, will KC be able to find their rhythm with a new starter in the backfield, wearing their whites for the first time all season? Jax seems to be a good place to find out.

29. Lions (28.1)

I thought this team was going in the right direction (And maybe they are) but a loss to the winless Rams doesn't prove to me they have turned the corner yet.

30. Rams (30.1)

Do you think Steven Jackson was imaging running through the members of his own team last week? Congratulations to the Rams on their first win of the season.

31. Browns (30.9)

Derrick Anderson made the Pro Bowl 2 years ago and now he looks worse than Jamarcus Russel. Mangini is destroying this entire team.

32. Bucs (31.7)

Its permanently garbage time now in Tampa for the rest of the season and their rookie QB should get a good look for the rest of the year. Winning doesn't appear to be coming soon.