FanPost

Does Jesus hate the Chiefs or is He just a bad punter?


We've all see Dustin Colquitt point to the sky and bless the Lord when he makes a good punt.  We've all also seen him hang his head with pointer fingers curled and tucked away when he shanks it out of bounds 20 yards down field.  The former best player on our team (Ha Ha what a funny joke I've heard used 1000 times in KC, bleh) had two chances in overtime to bury the Cowboys in their own end zone which could have given our defense a better chance to limit Miles Austin miracles, hopefully force Dallas to punt from their own end zone (which more often than gives the other team the ball on the good side of the 50), and could even give the Chiefs a shot at a game winning safety.

But instead, the Altar Boy FAILED twice to even get the ball inside the ten.  Now i didn't watch him after the first punt, I was busy hanging my head...  But I know what I saw after that second punt in OT.  It was a group of  Beisel-less Chiefs waiting to pounce on the football when it hits the one yard line.  But they never had a shot, for the ball was fair caught by Crayton at the 21 yard line.  Praise JESUS!!!!!!!  Point to the Sky!!!!!!  Both hands now, just one isn't enough!!!!!!  Apparently Dustin Colquitt could not have blown his most important punt in the last year without the Holy Spirit flowing through his washed up leg!!!

I don't get it.  He's not curing cancer, he's not saving orphans from a burning building, hell he's not even throwing a TD pass.  He's punting.  I put up with his pointing shenanigans when he was young and good.  When he used to kick that googly knuckleball I'd even say, "Hey maybe there is a higher power making that ball do what it does."  But now he's a below average NFL punter, and the pointing has to stop.  For God sakes, you look like a douchebag, Colquitt.  Pointing to the sky after you FAIL a punt is embarrassing to all of Kansas City no matter what your religion.  The only time you should be pointing to the sky is when you receive your paycheck.
Sadly, our new hope at Kicker is mimicking Colquitt.  Hey Succop, stop it.  Knock it off.  Don't do that.  But at least he's scoring points.

PS I just pointed to the sky after I completed this little article.  God said to me, "Stop it you douche."

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of Arrowhead Pride's writers or editors. It does reflect the views of this particular fan though, which is as important as the views of Arrowhead Pride writers or editors.

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