The Kansas City Chiefs dropped another close one today to the Bye Week, proving that even when we don't play, we still lose.
The game started as most Chiefs games this season have gone, with the Chiefs starting off with a 3 and out. After Larry Johnson tripped over his own two feet after a gain of eight on first down, Damon Huard underthrew Dwayne Bowe on second down, and Tony Gonalez on third down, though the third down incompletion could have been affected by Gonzalez being on the phone with a New York realtor. Despite the fact that the Bye Week's defense is entirely comprised of fictional players, Coach Herm Edwards elected not to go for it on 4th and 2, instead electing to punt to the always dangerous Bye Week return team, later stating "You play to win the game."
The game was back and forth for most of the game until the Bye Week, showing some trickeration, used a fake reverse end-around statue-of-liberty play to strike for a 38 yard touchdown to Absolutely Noone. The excess trick play was unnecessary as the Chiefs defense was perplexed by the foreign concept of a team "trying to win."
Late in the game, with a 4th and 1 from the goal line of the Bye Week, Herm Edwards elected to kick a field goal, despite being down 4 with only 30 seconds remaining, when a touchdown would have won the game and there were no actual defenders on the field. Edwards defended the move later by saying "What do you want me to do? We have a game plan. We kick the field goal in that situation and play for field position. We had confidence in our defense being able to get us the ball back. It just didn't work out for us. Sure, it was only a hard. But have you walked a yard? Do you know how long that is? It's like, this big!" The Chiefs' kick was subsequently blocked by the crushing weight of expectations and the Bye Week killed the remaining clock on downs.
After the game, Larry Johnson said "It's disappointing. You think you can beat someone that doesn't exist, but I just didn't get the ball enough. I only carried it 30 times. That 31st one? I was going to break that one."
Tony Gonzalez said "What? Oh, sorry, I'm on the phone... Yeah, sorry about that. What's that? Yes, absolutely, I need an ice maker. What? Eli Manning is quarterback? That's awesome! Can he throw ten yards? Awesome!"
Tamba Hali said "I make poopie."
Jared Page just ran into a wall and knocked himself unconscious.
The Bye Week (1-58348343448349384348394) said they felt like this was a building block, but nothing to get too excited about.
"It's the Chiefs, man. Come on." said No One.